Don't Do That.

Yakima 728
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I feel you, bro. But currently I'm dry hopping with aeration stone and some inch of silicon tube instead of the stir bar.
^_^
 
Store your Ph5 right next to your PBW. Yeah, I almost did that.
 
Don't try to filter the yeast out of a batch of ginger beer using a 1 micron filter... while primary fermentation is still going on.

...or the filter will clog before even one gallon is filtered, the CO2 you're using to push the brew from the fermenter to the filter will back up in the fermenter, the stopper will launch quickly achieving orbital escape velocity, and you'll have to explain to SWMBO how you got yeast on the kitchen ceiling.
 
Ike said:
Don't try to filter the yeast out of a batch of ginger beer using a 1 micron filter... while primary fermentation is still going on.

...or the filter will clog before even one gallon is filtered, the CO2 you're using to push the brew from the fermenter to the filter will back up in the fermenter, the stopper will launch quickly achieving orbital escape velocity, and you'll have to explain to SWMBO how you got yeast on the kitchen ceiling.
Click to expand...

Ouch
 
Don't turn the pressure on your 3 gallon keg to 25 psi, and then space out for five-plus days thinking you set it to 15 psi...first overcarbed beer since we started kegging, still trying to get it down to where it should be.

Don't do that!
 
Getting over enthusiastic in a group grain buy, buying three and half sacks of base malts, then moving house twice in seven months, breaking your collarbone badly that prevented brewing for nine months, and eventually throwing out the last 20lbs of grain three years after the group-buy when the containers are full of moths, and after several low-efficiency batches, probably due to the age of the grain.

Don't do that.
 
Made a Timothy Talyor clone a while back.
Recipe called for .9 oz of black malt.
I put in 9 oz of black malt.
Got pissed off till I tasted it, it was good, but don't do that.
 
flars said:
A long, long time ago, a cousin performed a physics experiment. We were swimming in a pond that was crossed by an electric cattle fence. He wondered if electricity could travel upstream. He peed on it while standing in the pond.

Don't Do That!!
Click to expand...

When I did it, it was dark and I had forgotten that I ran a wire across the bottom of the fence to keep dogs from digging under. The shock caused scar tissue to form, blocking flow in my urethra, which required surgery and 6 months with a catheter. Don't do that!
 
Well, when it came time to be snipped, the physician prepared me with a numbing medication. He proceeded to commence the procedure. We both discovered, at exactly the same instant, that where he decided to cut the numbing medication had not been effective.

Yeah. Gave me just a little bit of an idea how cattle might feel.
 
mongoose33 said:
Well, when it came time to be snipped, the physician prepared me with a numbing medication. He proceeded to commence the procedure. We both discovered, at exactly the same time, that where he decided to cut the numbing medication had not been effective.

Yeah. Gave me just a little bit of an idea how cattle might feel.
Click to expand...

OOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!:eek::eek::eek:
 
mongoose33 said:
Well, when it came time to be snipped, the physician prepared me with a numbing medication. He proceeded to commence the procedure. We both discovered, at exactly the same time, that where he decided to cut the numbing medication had not been effective.

Yeah. Gave me just a little bit of an idea how cattle might feel.
Click to expand...


I can't help but to wonder if there's a physician's on-line community out there and a thread called, "Don't do that" and the Dr typed' "well, one time...don't do that!"
 
Murphys_Law said:
I can't help but to wonder if there's a physician's on-line community out there and a thread called, "Don't do that" and the Dr typed' "well, one time...don't do that!"
Click to expand...
I think the more eye opening one would be the one of ER docs, nurses and EMTs (should such a thing exist). Every so often you hear rumors of what they've seen.
 
This is easily the best thread I ever found, and reading new messages every morning make me start the day wearing a big smile!
Please, do that!
Thanks!
 
dyqik said:
I think the more eye opening one would be the one of ER docs, nurses and EMTs (should such a thing exist). Every so often you hear rumors of what they've seen.
Click to expand...

Let's just say I run in healthcare circles; the link below is simply one of the best collections of hilarity I've ever read.

The thread is LONG... but it's worth bookmarking and working your way through.

https://forums.studentdoctor.net/threads/things-i-learn-from-my-patients.257985/

...and, you're welcome! :D
 
Back on topic:

You know that keg, the one that's been taking FOREVER to clear up, and has FINALLY started to show a little clarity? Well, when SWMBO makes a huge mess in the garage necessitating completely cleaning the floor, don't move the kegerator back and forth several times to clean around it, or the very-nearly-clear beer will quickly return back to its former hefe-like cloudiness.
 
1. Take a keg of homebrew on a LONG roadtrip and forget extra O-rings & keg lube; 2. Don't catch the husband before he yanks on the string holding the bag of orange peel inside the keg lid, thereby ruining said o-ring the day of the rehearsal dinner; 3. have a brain fart and decide the best way to unclog the dip tube is to dismantle the post on a fully carbed keg without fully releasing the pressure (yes a mess). Fortunately the beer didn't suffer and was terrific, but it did cause us to have a hissy fit on the way to one of only THREE homebrew supply shops in Idaho (really??? THREE??).
 
seatazzz said:
one of only THREE homebrew supply shops in Idaho (really??? THREE??).
Click to expand...


Welcome to my world.


I am lucky, actually. I spent my first two years in state living quite literally three blocks from one of them; even now I'm still only about a five minute drive.

Where was the shindig? It's a great time of year to be up in the mountains of Idaho!
 
seatazzz said:
3. have a brain fart and decide the best way to unclog the dip tube is to dismantle the post on a fully carbed keg without fully releasing the pressure (yes a mess).
Click to expand...

Wish you had posted this LAST week.... Yeah, had the same great idea of unclogging the dip tube this weekend. Don't do that.
 
Put 2oz ground coriander, 2oz ground pepper, and 2oz orange peel in the boil kettle for a Saison. Plugged up the outlet and forced me to take undue measures to remove said wort after cool down. Had to pour it out from the top of the keggle after siphoning off as much as I could. Don't do that.
 
Try to make a "KISS" style flashpot for your gradeshcool talent show: Take old fashioned, screw in, glass top electrical fuse, break out the "glass". Unwrap a load of firecrackers and fill the fuse with the gunpowder, pack tightly and tape over the top. Screw into "bare" ceramic light socket, wire to stripped lamp cord. Set on your friends driveway, and plug the cord into an electrical outlet. After watching all the neighbors lights go on, and realizing the ceramic light socket was completely gone as well as a few of your friend's house windows, AND then grabbing the bare wire (in awe of the explosion) while the cord was still plugged in...

Don't do that. Don't do any of that.

Luckily no one sustained any shrapnel wounds.... other than my friend whose dad gave him a good ass whuppin'
 

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