Firewalker11
Brewer
No, no you couldn't, you standing there ready to be hugged was the fix to her Schmidty day!
My wife is pissed
- Thread starter chessking
- Start date
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No, no you couldn't, you standing there ready to be hugged was the fix to her Schmidty day!
You're close. I've been married almost 30 years and I've almost figured this stuff out.
A woman wants to tell you her problems, and have you listen and agree with whatever solution she came up with. This involves shaking your head in an affirmative manner and repeatedly muttering, 'You're right'. No other response is required. Any other response puts you in grave danger of becoming the new problem.
If you don't participate in the conversation, then you're not listening, you don't care, and you immediately become the new problem.
Don't attempt to inject logic into the conversation or you immediately become the new problem.
Under no circumstances should you ever say 'Is this really that big of deal?' or you immediately become the new problem, and should probably get ready to duck because some airborne object is undoubtedly heading your way. I know this from experience. A pissed of woman will use anything as a projectile. I have a scar on my face from a potato masher my sister threw at me. I didn't even see it coming.
Exactly!!!!
Stillraining
Well-Known Member
Ya but she didn't tell you the UPS guy was parked in your diveway.
OP
OP
chessking
Well-Known Member
You're close. I've been married almost 30 years and I've almost figured this stuff out.
A woman wants to tell you her problems, and have you listen and agree with whatever solution she came up with. This involves shaking your head in an affirmative manner and repeatedly muttering, 'You're right'. No other response is required. Any other response puts you in grave danger of becoming the new problem.
If you don't participate in the conversation, then you're not listening, you don't care, and you immediately become the new problem.
Don't attempt to inject logic into the conversation or you immediately become the new problem.
Under no circumstances should you ever say 'Is this really that big of deal?' or you immediately become the new problem, and should probably get ready to duck because some airborne object is undoubtedly heading your way. I know this from experience. A pissed of woman will use anything as a projectile. I have a scar on my face from a potato masher my sister threw at me. I didn't even see it coming.
All true. you dont even need to remember any of this stuff afterward, just pretend to listen. Don't for any reason attempt to solve anything. Just fake some sincerity and when the storm blows over, move on.
Tread lightly with that one. Not remembering at least some of the psycho-babble will bite ya in the shorts later.
TX_Brewing
Well-Known Member
Our UPS guy is a gal! I wold only be upset if there weren't photos!
Where_the_Redfern_Brews
Well-Known Member
We just had our first kid a few weeks ago so we were supposed to have a "mellow" Christmas but my wife still invited all her family over tonight and is busy in the kitchen. I on the other hand am drinking beer in the garage and will "entertain" her brothers out here when they arrive. The mother in law is all over the baby so I am off the hook, not too bad!
Also went for a mountain bike ride a little bit ago and filled my propane tanks for brewing tomorrow.
Also went for a mountain bike ride a little bit ago and filled my propane tanks for brewing tomorrow.
Stillraining
Well-Known Member
estricklin
Well-Known Member
Mountain bikes are good for the soul.
Congrats on the new addition to the family.
OK, show of hands; how many are getting really excited looking at that picture ... because those 5 boxes could contain an awful lot of brewing equipment/ingredients.
What boxes?
OP
OP
chessking
Well-Known Member
There were boxes? Oh yeah, I see them now.
slym2none
"Lazy extract brewer."
What boxes??
PlexVector
Mellow Goose Brewing
Nice set of boxes!
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My wife has been remarkably cool about my brewing. No complaining about the money spent or space occupied. I can’t think of a single argument or fight that has happened because of it. In fact, I can’t even think of a single negative comment I’ve heard her say (“don’t you have enough beer already?????,” etc.)
And I’m intent on keeping it that way. Having your wife at war with your hobbies SUCKS. One thing I learned from my first marriage is that once a woman starts down a path of being irritated with one of your hobbies, then she tends to focus on being irritated about it. Over time, this leads to the perception of her being “unreasonable,” and in fact, she probably is being unreasonable. The problem is, her irritation doesn’t just go away, it stays in a bank and accumulates. Eventually, the topic becomes touchy, and she reaches a point where, for example, your taking 10 minutes to pull and check a gravity sample is cause for her to get into a huff. Then, you get angry at her for being so “unreasonable,” say a bunch of things out of frustration, and the process repeats.
I’ve found a few basic guidelines do the trick:
- Making sure I properly clean up – and that includes empty bottles not piling up on the side of the counter (it’s easy for guys to complain about women nagging, but I wouldn’t be happy if my wife’s dog grooming were always leaving a big mess, so I understand the importance of this part. She cleans up, and so do I.)
- Demonstrating that I am giving consideration to what she likes by making sure there is always a stout available for her to drink (I like stouts too, so win/win)
- Selecting the time slots for brewing tasks based on common sense and courtesy. For example, if it’s 2 days before the annual family BBQ or Christmas gathering, there are probably 25 chores/errands that need to be done and it’s probably not a good idea to fire up the kettle.
Regarding the last point, I’ve got my process down to the point where I can bang out a brew day on a week night, which has been immensely helpful, because it means that any day of the week can be a candidate, as opposed to me being forced to strictly rely upon weekend time which has too many things competing for it.
And I’m intent on keeping it that way. Having your wife at war with your hobbies SUCKS. One thing I learned from my first marriage is that once a woman starts down a path of being irritated with one of your hobbies, then she tends to focus on being irritated about it. Over time, this leads to the perception of her being “unreasonable,” and in fact, she probably is being unreasonable. The problem is, her irritation doesn’t just go away, it stays in a bank and accumulates. Eventually, the topic becomes touchy, and she reaches a point where, for example, your taking 10 minutes to pull and check a gravity sample is cause for her to get into a huff. Then, you get angry at her for being so “unreasonable,” say a bunch of things out of frustration, and the process repeats.
I’ve found a few basic guidelines do the trick:
- Making sure I properly clean up – and that includes empty bottles not piling up on the side of the counter (it’s easy for guys to complain about women nagging, but I wouldn’t be happy if my wife’s dog grooming were always leaving a big mess, so I understand the importance of this part. She cleans up, and so do I.)
- Demonstrating that I am giving consideration to what she likes by making sure there is always a stout available for her to drink (I like stouts too, so win/win)
- Selecting the time slots for brewing tasks based on common sense and courtesy. For example, if it’s 2 days before the annual family BBQ or Christmas gathering, there are probably 25 chores/errands that need to be done and it’s probably not a good idea to fire up the kettle.
Regarding the last point, I’ve got my process down to the point where I can bang out a brew day on a week night, which has been immensely helpful, because it means that any day of the week can be a candidate, as opposed to me being forced to strictly rely upon weekend time which has too many things competing for it.
Sorry to continue a frankenthread, but my wife bought me my first kit for our anniversary. So anything brewing-related is really her fault and she should have realized this before she got me into this hobby.
