I broke pretty much every rule in the book...

[Laughing_Gnome_Invisible]

Chichester? oooh! I'm from Southampton! Just down the road!

Welcome to the forum, Henry! And.....er.......good luck with this "beer"

 

[Rhymenoceros]

FOOTBALL hooligan

This is America!

 

[brewbies]

Who's the mother flippin'?

 

[Rhymenoceros]

I'm the motha flippin' Rhymenoceros, my beats are fat and the birds are on my back, and I'm horny. IM HORNY.

Mutha uckas!

 

[Laughing_Gnome_Invisible]

This is America!

Where football is played with the hands.

 

[llazy_llama]

And handball is also played with the hands! The confusion never ends.

 

[Rhymenoceros]

It touches the foot a few times during the game.

 

[onelegout]

Chichester? oooh! I'm from Southampton! Just down the road!

Welcome to the forum, Henry! And.....er.......good luck with this "beer"

hahah cool! I'm off to southampton tomorrow to photograph a VW rolling road event!

p.s.

 

[Laughing_Gnome_Invisible]

We don't have a Handegg hooligan problem around these parts. Just a terrible Handegg team.

 

[onelegout]

Hahah yeah - Football (soccer)'s a fantastic game, the problem is that premiership football has been poisoned by ridiculous amounts of money; the game is great it's just a pity about the fans, the attitudes, and the ridonkulous paychecks.

 

[CBBaron]

We don't have a Handegg hooligan problem around these parts. Just a terrible Handegg team.

You missed the Handegg hooligans in the Dog Pound back when the local team could actually win a few games. Not quite football hooligans but quite the characters any ways.

I think your mash efficiency with the wheat malt is likely much better than people have been predicting. You were keeping it on the hot side of a mash so it is very reasonable that the mash completed conversion of starch to sugar or nearly so. Then it was rinsed. I think you probably have very little if any starches in the "beer" and probably 50-60% efficiency. Its still a hyper hopped low gravity beer but you may be able to swallow some.

Making beer from AG is not all that difficult if you do a little research first. The only extra equipment required is a 5-10gal cooler with a bulkhead and stainless steel braid. You will also need some way to boil about 6.5gal of wort. In the US turkey fryers are cheap and readily available. They include a high powered propane burner and a large (usually 30 qt) pot.

Good luck with your beer making.

Craig

 

[onelegout]

Thanks for the advice CBBaron!

In the US turkey fryers are cheap and readily available. They include a high powered propane burner and a large (usually 30 qt) pot.

See, here in the UK, we deep fry pretty much everything - but even WE don't go as far as deep frying whole turkeys!

 

[SumnerH]

Thanks for the advice CBBaron!

See, here in the UK, we deep fry pretty much everything - but even WE don't go as far as deep frying whole turkeys!

It's overrated. The insides get nice and tender, but you can do that with regular oven roasting if you know what you're doing. The skin gets overdone when frying and the bird doesn't come out as nice-looking. It is a lot faster to cook, but the actual amount of effort is even higher than roasting once you factor in the cleanup (roasting takes a long time but most of it is just letting the oven do its thing).

It's mainly just to say that you did it, IMO. And it's pretty recent that it's gotten at all popular in the US (there are a few regions where it's been done for a long time).

 

[onelegout]

heheh I can't imagine anything more awkward than trying to deep fry something that large I've never understood peoples problem with roasting turkeys - you just stick the bloody things in the oven and cook it for a certain amount of time at a certain temperature!
This thread has been in more directions than any other in the history of the internet.

 

[Homercidal]

heheh I can't imagine anything more awkward than trying to deep fry something that large I've never understood peoples problem with roasting turkeys - you just stick the bloody things in the oven and cook it for a certain amount of time at a certain temperature!
This thread has been in more directions than any other in the history of the internet.

You'd be surprised around here, although I do find myself looking up to see if I've wandered into the drunken ramblings page!

I've had a deep fried turkey once and it was very good. Maybe the best bird I've ever had. But I agree that if you can spend the time, roasting is easier and there is no leftover oil to mess with and nearly zero danger. I've concluded that I will probably never use my turkey fryer for anything other than brewing beer!

I can't decide whether to brew:

Cohen the Beerbarian

or

Cohen the Barbeerian

That would look awesome with a picture of Cohen holding his sword, his ancient muscles rippling under his skin, and a toothless sneer across his face (this is pre-troll-diamond-teeth-dentures Cohen).

 

[FSR402]

how much longer before you drink this stuff? Can you ship me a bottle?

 

[onelegout]

haha I would ship you a bottle but it wouldn't get there in one piece, besides I only made 6 bottles of the stuff!


Cohen the Barbeerian!!!! go for it!

 

[onelegout]

I've decided; my next beer is going to be called 'DEATH.'
However, the label is going to be extremely colourful and full of flowers and butterflies and rainbows

 

[Laughing_Gnome_Invisible]

how much longer before you drink this stuff? Can you ship me a bottle?

I think there is a law against shipping high explosives in the post.

 

[phrogpilot73]

It's overrated. The insides get nice and tender, but you can do that with regular oven roasting if you know what you're doing. The skin gets overdone when frying and the bird doesn't come out as nice-looking. It is a lot faster to cook, but the actual amount of effort is even higher than roasting once you factor in the cleanup (roasting takes a long time but most of it is just letting the oven do its thing).

It's mainly just to say that you did it, IMO. And it's pretty recent that it's gotten at all popular in the US (there are a few regions where it's been done for a long time).

When I moved to North Carolina, it was before Turkey Frying showed up throughout the country. I first thought "damn, they'll fry ANYTHING down here." Tried it once and really don't think I'll go back. I agree that there are certain areas of the skin that get over cooked, but it doesn't take me long to clean at all. While watching TV after Thanksgiving dinner, the oil is outside cooling. Once it's cool, I have a handheld pump to move the oil from the pot back into the jugs (takes about 5 minutes). Then I just wash out the pot, ready for the next one. If you do a rub, instead of injecting or brining - then you will absolutely end up with a burnt outside.

Personally, I'm sticking with it because I get more consistent results. But then again, I've been frying turkeys since '01...

I've never understood peoples problem with roasting turkeys - you just stick the bloody things in the oven and cook it for a certain amount of time at a certain temperature!

Oh lord... Please don't do that. Use a meat thermometer... Prevents over & under cooking. I've got a remote probe that stays in the meat the whole time. You'll end up with a much better turkey. And if you're gonna roast - brine. It'll be juicier.

 

[Laughing_Gnome_Invisible]

I've never fried a turkey, or even tasted one........But I'm totally fine the the badassedness of the concept!

Thanksgiving, chuck a few brews down your neck and get almost legless. Start an argument with the ass of a brother in law then stand around a vat of boiling fat and throw in a huge bird while trying to stand up straight without leaning on anything......I'm fine with that!!

 

[onelegout]

brine?! lol! I've never once heard anyone use brine for a turkey :S
christmas before last my neighbor cooked his christmas turkey on the bbq - was fantastic. Not just any bbq of course; a weber with roasting coal tins.

 

[Homercidal]

I've decided; my next beer is going to be called 'DEATH.'
However, the label is going to be extremely colourful and full of flowers and butterflies and rainbows

And a white horse named Binky.

Or maybe, Alfred's Deep Fried Porter.

 

[phrogpilot73]

I've never fried a turkey, or even tasted one........But I'm totally fine the the badassedness of the concept!

Thanksgiving, chuck a few brews down your neck and get almost legless. Start an argument with the ass of a brother in law then stand around a vat of boiling fat and throw in a huge bird while trying to stand up straight without leaning on anything......I'm fine with that!!

You've got it a little out of order... The brews/legless part happen WHILE you're frying a turkey. When you're standing around a vat of oil with nothing to do but watch... You'd be surprised how many beers you finish in a 45 minute period.

Not to mention that you're standing outside, so the ladies don't really want to come out (it's cold) but all the men do. It's great.

brine?! lol! I've never once heard anyone use brine for a turkey

Trust me, it's worth it - especially if you roast.

 

[Tealc]

"They don't call it a quarter-pounder?"

"No man, they got the metric system over there. The wouldn't know what the f*** a quarter pounder was."

Sorry, so much metric in that post I had a hard time reading it.

This sounds a bit odd to me. What's so hard to understand about metric? To me, it doesn't make much sense that some countries still haven't evolved from using for example body parts to measure things.

 

[llazy_llama]

What's hard to understand about it is that I wasn't taught it in school as a kid, so it's not as ingrained for me as it is for you. Second, I don't think that changing from one system of measurement to another is "evolving," so much as it is "changing from one system of measurement to another."

But thank you for trolling American Airlines. Have a lovely flight.

 

[Hegh]

This sounds a bit odd to me. What's so hard to understand about metric? To me, it doesn't make much sense that some countries still haven't evolved from using for example body parts to measure things.

Actually, the US custom system is the perfect system for brewers, since the historical origin of most of the measurements is based on barleycorns.

According to Wikipedia: The inch was defined in 1066 to be the length of 3 barleycorns. The ounce is equal to 437.5 grains. Grains are the seeds of whatever grain is common in the area, so barley was the basis for weight also. Volume is a bit different historically, but now it is all based on fluid ounces; a fluid ounce is the volume of 1/16 of a pound of water, so again we're into ounces and pounds, and back to barleycorns.

The metric system is all based around water, and what's water without barley?

 

[ftlstrings]

might be prudent to uncap your bottles and even put balloons over the tops to let the pressure escape safely.

~M~

 

[Rhymenoceros]

What's hard to understand about it is that I wasn't taught it in school as a kid, so it's not as ingrained for me as it is for you. Second, I don't think that changing from one system of measurement to another is "evolving," so much as it is "changing from one system of measurement to another."

But thank you for trolling American Airlines. Have a lovely flight.

Not to mention the absurd cost that would be associated with the switch.

 

[Homercidal]

While the measurement makes no difference, the metric SYSTEM has much to be desired. Of course I still love the good old SAE because that is what I know, but after using metric measurements on a project, that gets pretty darn easy to use real quick. As long as I have a metric measuring device that is.

 

[madewithchicken]

Okay this is AWESOME!

There are SO many ways to boot leg the beer making process. Lord knows I cut some dangerous corners.

Next time boil your wort, leave it in the pot and add some yeast after it cools. Then put a lid on it and wait. It is not the best way but man it would be better than what you have going on here.

Henry I hope that you have a very good excuse for this. Underage maybe?

I hope your next hobby is not nuclear engineering.

 

[onelegout]

Henry I hope that you have a very good excuse for this. Underage maybe?

I'm not underage in the UK, but probably am where you are - I'm 19 but have held a healthy taste for good beer since I drank my first pint of Summer Lightening at about 14 years old. If anyone wants to judge me on my age, they can go ahead; but the chances are I've tasted just as wide a variety of beers as the majority of people on this forum. I'd really like people to keep in mind that this adventure was purely for the sake of good fun, and the real brewing shall begin next month. In two years time I would like to hope that I'll have a decent amount of brewing experience and be able to pitch my beers against the rest of you experienced chaps!

And on that note, I'm off to the pub.

Cheerio.
H

P.S. I'll leave you with a photo I took in the summer - this is my local pub; The Fox Goes Free in Charlton in the South Downs. It used to be called The Fox when it was tied to its brewery but when it became a free house it changed it's name to The Fox Goes Free This is what a REAL british country pub garden is like; you're missing out Americans!

Edit: By the way - that's a pint of Harvey's Sussex Best if anyone was wondering

 

[rasherb]

Nice. That's my new desktop photo.

This thread is unbelievable. Who's going to do the first "Rule Breaker's" mild braggot tribute brew?

 

[TexasStu]

We sometimes have cows in many of our 'pubs' too!

 

[ChshreCat]

Not sure if I want to smell cowflop the whole time I'm drinking somewhere, but the view is nice.

 

[phrogpilot73]

If only I could recreate a true pub in the US, and get the locals to understand the culture associated with it. I'd be a rich man!

 

[MacBruver]

Can't wait to see how this turns out! I'll be brewing my first batch of beer tomorrow... not my first exploration with fermentation, though.

That was in college when I tried to make "Cider" out of some apple juice, white sugar, and fleischman's bread yeast! I did use a balloon over the top of it, which filled up almost completely within a couple of days. It smelled awful, and I never drank more than a couple sips of it... horrible, horrible stuff.

 

[Hegh]

Can't wait to see how this turns out! I'll be brewing my first batch of beer tomorrow... not my first exploration with fermentation, though.

That was in college when I tried to make "Cider" out of some apple juice, white sugar, and fleischman's bread yeast! I did use a balloon over the top of it, which filled up almost completely within a couple of days. It smelled awful, and I never drank more than a couple sips of it... horrible, horrible stuff.

Sounds almost like EdWort's Apfelwein, but you probably didn't think to sanitize, right?

 

[Joos]

Iv'e gotta say.Dump the first attempt cuz it's not going to taste like beer.And man I'm jealous of the pub picture.Where i live bars are more for doing blow in the bathroom than good brew and good scenery.

 

[onelegout]

Can't wait to see how this turns out! I'll be brewing my first batch of beer tomorrow... not my first exploration with fermentation, though.

That was in college when I tried to make "Cider" out of some apple juice, white sugar, and fleischman's bread yeast! I did use a balloon over the top of it, which filled up almost completely within a couple of days. It smelled awful, and I never drank more than a couple sips of it... horrible, horrible stuff.

Heheh my girlfriend's brother did that! He's 15 - his parents discovered a plastic bottle with fermenting fruit juice in it and decided to buy him a homebrew kit for his 16th birthday! I wish that all kids were introduced to alcohol in such a responsible and respectful manner! Good luck with your first batch; let us know how it turns out!

If only I could recreate a true pub in the US, and get the locals to understand the culture associated with it. I'd be a rich man!

I don't know; America has a fantastically diverse range of different watering holes - I've drunk in many a place throughout the states, from the napa valley and mexican vineyards, to the micro breweries of Georgia (Sweetwater Blue anyone?) and many bars between the two! In England we have pubs, and just pubs. In the states you have a much more interesting range of places to drink, although there's no denying that a true british pub is something very, very special.

- H

P.S. my girlfriend's FINALLY ready so we're going to the pub now lol!