So I have 1 child, and after my "procedure", I've ensured that I only have 1 child.
My wife and I are happy with our 1 child, and don't feel any need to have any more. We were always between 0 and 1 for how many kids we wanted. The idea of more didn't/doesn't appeal to us.
We're both science nerds (social and hard science) and we wanted to see what we could make and what we could do with a child. She teaches us a bunch of new skills and we can see her learn, it's very nerdy/fun.
Now the amount of criticism we get from friends, family and STRANGERS is ****ed up. We've actually stopped being friends with people because they were relentless with their stupid "you're depriving your kids an experience". Or strangers that are like "you need to have a second to play with the first"... wtf? It's a HUMAN BEING, not a dog. I'm not going to create a second human being to just be my daughter's play thing. I'll buy her a pony, it's less responsibility, less expensive and I don't have to wake up at 2am to soothe the pony back to sleep after a nightmare.
Anyway... I'm just ranting. People are effing annoying with their opinions on the matter. Have whatever opinion you want (1 is too many, or not enough) but keep it to yourself. I didn't just randomly make the decision to have my first daughter, and I didn't just slice my nut-sack open and cut my vas deferens without any thought. I waited 2 years, and I have less and less desire for a second than I've ever had.
My daughter is a peach. She comes with standard baby/toddler issues, but she naps without issue, and she sleeps through the night without issue. She's perfectly normal in health and mental functions. There's no external reason to not have a second, we just don't want that. My wife and I have a myriad of hobbies, and we want to be able to travel internationally once per year, and we couldn't do that with 2 kids - both financially, and time-wise.
In the past few recent interactions with strangers that told me I should have a second, I've told them:
- "my wife is dead, *******"
- "my wife can't have any more kids... thanks for bringing that up"
- "this one is adopted, I'm sterile"
- "go fcuk yourself"
I have no urge to be polite to people that feel they should criticize me in front of my daughter. Most people look horrified when I say **** like that... but seriously, I don't go up to 35yo's without kids and say "you should have kids NOW", or slander those that have 4 kids.
My wife and I both have siblings, and we had polarly different experiences with them. She played with hers all the time, but as adults, they rarely ever talk. My brother and I were mortal enemies until he turned 18, and we've been friends ever since.
My daughter won't know what a sibling is like, so she won't know what she's missing, or what she has to endure. It can go either way, but she has 2 ridiculously immature parents and a bunch of friends and 7 cousins. She'll have great experiences.
/rant.
My wife and I are happy with our 1 child, and don't feel any need to have any more. We were always between 0 and 1 for how many kids we wanted. The idea of more didn't/doesn't appeal to us.
We're both science nerds (social and hard science) and we wanted to see what we could make and what we could do with a child. She teaches us a bunch of new skills and we can see her learn, it's very nerdy/fun.
Now the amount of criticism we get from friends, family and STRANGERS is ****ed up. We've actually stopped being friends with people because they were relentless with their stupid "you're depriving your kids an experience". Or strangers that are like "you need to have a second to play with the first"... wtf? It's a HUMAN BEING, not a dog. I'm not going to create a second human being to just be my daughter's play thing. I'll buy her a pony, it's less responsibility, less expensive and I don't have to wake up at 2am to soothe the pony back to sleep after a nightmare.
Anyway... I'm just ranting. People are effing annoying with their opinions on the matter. Have whatever opinion you want (1 is too many, or not enough) but keep it to yourself. I didn't just randomly make the decision to have my first daughter, and I didn't just slice my nut-sack open and cut my vas deferens without any thought. I waited 2 years, and I have less and less desire for a second than I've ever had.
My daughter is a peach. She comes with standard baby/toddler issues, but she naps without issue, and she sleeps through the night without issue. She's perfectly normal in health and mental functions. There's no external reason to not have a second, we just don't want that. My wife and I have a myriad of hobbies, and we want to be able to travel internationally once per year, and we couldn't do that with 2 kids - both financially, and time-wise.
In the past few recent interactions with strangers that told me I should have a second, I've told them:
- "my wife is dead, *******"
- "my wife can't have any more kids... thanks for bringing that up"
- "this one is adopted, I'm sterile"
- "go fcuk yourself"
I have no urge to be polite to people that feel they should criticize me in front of my daughter. Most people look horrified when I say **** like that... but seriously, I don't go up to 35yo's without kids and say "you should have kids NOW", or slander those that have 4 kids.
My wife and I both have siblings, and we had polarly different experiences with them. She played with hers all the time, but as adults, they rarely ever talk. My brother and I were mortal enemies until he turned 18, and we've been friends ever since.
My daughter won't know what a sibling is like, so she won't know what she's missing, or what she has to endure. It can go either way, but she has 2 ridiculously immature parents and a bunch of friends and 7 cousins. She'll have great experiences.
/rant.